'There is a voice that doesn't use words. Listen.' - Rumi The new oil on aluminium works seek to combine 2 distinct styles that I've been working on for the past 6 years or so. They are : (1) The cityscape paintings and the (2) Oil on aluminium abstract experiments (namely, the Surface Tension, Terra Firma and Particle Series of works). I've always wanted to paint cityscapes on aluminium composite panels. What a challenge! Thankfully, 2023 (after many murals - which are great experiences) brings this intrinsic calling to realization. In making the works (there are others, which I will slowly parcel out on the socials) I am inured by errors in judgement, limitations and insight which make the work all the more human. The works are failable, immersive, raw and immediate. There's a sense of urgency - the piece almost falls apart. But it doesn't. It's not there yet, and at the same time it has arrived. A delicate balance. A quiet strength. One can very quickly go from - This is okay (not bad) to complete destruction. Aluminiums are very unforgiving surfaces, repelling paint and reacting in quite unconventional ways. We've definitely got a risky thing going on here. 'Elixir' (Jalan Tun Tan Cheng Lock, KL), 48x48 inches, Oil on aluminium, 2023. Sold 'Untitled ACP04-2023', 48x48 inches, Oil on aluminium, 2023 This monologue only happens to the best of us. When we are at the precipice of understanding everything, yet oddly in unfamiliar territory. We still don't know what exactly it is that we're searching for. It's a place where experience meets wonder. Where realism dances with abstraction. Where strength meets pliability.
It's where structure meets chaos - beckoning more questions. It's disruptive. A shifting of perspectives. A new way of looking at things. These are concepts. Brought into the world through a desire to form, build, create, cajole, ossify. It is the calling that needed to be heard. It's difficult for me as an artist to leave the marks that were laid down - alone. Because it's final. It cuts off all other possibilities. But it has to be done. It's about instilling discipline into the process. It's about trusting that I have done my best. That we've reached the end. But of course, that never happens intrinsically. 'The impediment to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way.' - Marcus Aurelius
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'It takes a village to raise a child' - African proverb It's 2023. It's a Saturday and it's in the afternoon as I write this sitting at my dining table at home (the typing and uploading of this essay will be done sitting in front of my Mac Mini later). The sun beams its rays from about 150 million kilometres away and it nurtures and provides sustenance to all forms of life on our planet - Humans, plants and animals thrive in this auspicious configuration. As I sit here and write, I begin to form an idea of what it is that I'm supposed to express. This feeling is aligned with title of this essay : To put one's foot in front of the other. As simple as this statement may or may not sound, I truly believe that understanding simple truths like this make all the difference in one's life. For example, following the non-hurried flow and simplicity of one's breath in and out is fundamentally the nature of our existence. Something which many take for granted, or completely forget about at times. I grew up at a time when there were no handphones. No personal computing. No social media. No Youtube, movies on demand and most of all - No Google. And because of this, we knew nothing about the world we lived in, except for things we read in Encyclopaedias, books, newspapers or through conversing with others. The family functioned as a grounding element, where one derived his/her/their first views of the world. Back then, it was okay not to know everything. There existed things out there that we needed to seek knowledge and experience for. To gain some insight and understanding. You had to work for your meal. So it was a different era. To learn about the world, you had to go out and experience it. And hopefully maintain your sanity at the end of the day. You went home after your explorations about life. The family unit was (and is) supposed to be coherent, sheltered - A safe place. But it also evolves and changes as one's needs (and family units, groups or systems) - change over time. Seasons change. So does character, habits and life choices do so with age, and with the times. New technologies are invented all the time. New energy and ways of working too. Science marches on. I have since then gone through many wonderful (and sometimes uncomfortable) changes, and writing this one the eve of my birthday, serves to highlight a passage of time to the narrative. What have I learnt? I'd like to show you a diagram of what artists' go through when they attempt new work (it's also called The Creative Process, in jest) : Ironically, I think it relates to a lot of other things in life too. It's about how we approach, think and experience things in life. These thoughts circulate (perhaps in mostly the same pattern) whenever we attempt a new task. It happens when we attempt mighty and challenging tasks. It's about beginnings and endings. We all encounter Act 2 : Conflict. At this stage we question our motives. We appear lost and confused. This leads to negative thoughts. I'm not good enough. Who am I trying to fool? I don't know what I'm doing. This sucks. I think it's a natural occurrence, and it's the part of the flow of things. Not knowing, not being able to see into the future is fairly normal; especially when we are confronted with the unknown. When we attempt new things for the first time, of course we don't know what we're doing. Wisdom and resilience comes after the experience, and never before. The point of going through with things is in the challenge. That you are called upon to partake and participate in this thing called life. The premise of all this is evolution. To live a fuller, more expansive life. You are growing and it's painful, no doubt. But change isn't painful, it's the resistance to change that is painful. Resistance comes from within, not externally. How do we find peace and stability in this process? Not overthinking helps. Wu-Wei. Effortless action. And faith. It is the labels that we give to ourselves and others, the thoughts and feelings that we attach ourselves to, that gives these things a sticky feeling. We give these things energy, a form, a name, a feeling - When we don't necessarily have to. There is a biological and chemical thing that happens in our brains when we keep thinking in a certain way for prolonged periods of time. I'm no neuroscientist or doctor, but neural pathways do exist and they carry electrical and biological energy in the process. Stick a metal rod into an orange and you can conduct enough energy to light an LED bulb. While we are governed by these biological, physiological and emotional impulses daily - being human - It would be beneficial to self reflect, meditate upon and study - Our limitations, as well as gifts. That yes, while we may possess biases and blind spots, we also carry in us seeds of creative energy (or waves, if you prefer that visual). We have our own specialties. Some are scientists who learn and discover new things about the earth we live in. Some are doctors that attend to the sick. Some are artists who work with their mediums to express music, writing, dance and art. Some are trained psychologists and they attend to mental and emotional health issues. The list goes on. 'The Well Where We All Go Down To Drink', 60x60 inches, Mixed Media on canvas, 2020 Each person you meet today or in the near future are but parts of the universe waving back at you. It's saying to you, 'Hey, hi!' or 'We are here, right now in the moment and what a great joy it is to see you!' Although, in some deviations the message can differ. Sometimes it's a serene whisper, connection and companionship. Sometimes it's on the other end of the spectrum - something that irks you. Something that makes you angry. Or bamboozles and disrupts your day. Or sometimes it makes you feel uncomfortable. Stressed out. But the premise is always this : It's something that asks for your attention. For your time and awareness. The difference lies in how you perceive it. What is it asking of you? To expand your awareness. Are you seeing and sensing these things from a perspective of fear, lack or understanding and awareness? I think we all intuitively know where we are operating from (if we dare to ask the questions that matter).
Take some time to address this. If you do, don't lump all your troubles into one basket, or funnel all your challenges into one particular moment. Break it down. Ask the question, why? What is it that I need to change and be aware of? Place one foot in front of the other. The destination / end goal is not important. It's how we navigate and walk the path that matters. Everyone has their own core beliefs and values, but I'd like to finish off with a few that resonate with me : With humility, love, abundance, understanding, awareness and camaraderie. Don't let the monkey mind get you. A journey of a thousand miles begins with the first step. Likewise, a richer and more fulfilling life begins not with the accumulation or desire of material goods or experiences - but in a state of better awareness and understanding of said goods and experiences.
In our lives, we will encounter a whole plethora of existences and experiences. People (including oneself) experience sadness, anger, anxiety, being burnt out, anguish, confusion, depression, feelings of being victimized etc. - Yet there exists on the same spectrum; Optimism, wealth and prosperity, contentment, melancholy, joy, excitement, hope etc. The feelings that exist in the world are broad, rich and expansive. This is what it means to be human, for the goal is to experience this life fully and wholeheartedly. At least, in my humble opinion, that is. We are here to express something. To feel something. To enjoy and experience what this world has to offer us. For some, this is a rough time. It's confusing. To them I say; This is your calling, your journey. It is your responsibility to transcend negative experiences. To see things for what they truly are. Things happen, yes. Some things we may feel 'good' about. Some 'bad'. I personally try not to label situations. I don't think there are such parallels in this narrative we call life. There are only things that happen, and we base how we feel about them, purely on our perceptions. Win or lose, they are parts of the games we play in life. Our reactions to the things that happen, matter. They are signposts to how we perceive the world and ourselves. The aim is to search within ourselves, the truth of the matter. Raising awareness, simply means to experience life more fully and richly. There are times when we make bad decisions. Times when we let our egos get the better of us. These are called blind spots. Times when we make ill informed, irrational and unconscious decisions. It is quite difficult to raise ones awareness without some form of habit, ritual, prayer or exercise that works to stop the mind from overthinking. Because when we think, or are thinking, we detach ourselves from who we truly are. And who are we? Conscious, aware beings in physical bodies. The more we think - the less we are connected to the Source, or Universe, or God. This is not to say, don't think. No. Of course we need to think, calculate, plan and execute. But the trick is to return to awareness. This fluctuation, this dance - is what I mean by being aware. Take accountability for your actions. Don't lose the plot. It will take practice. To change your life, you must make changes to your life. To get better at painting, paint more. To get better at writing, just write. To overcome fear, do the thing that scares you most. To be more aware, observe the thought as the one who observes. Reconnect with your consciousness. It is that simple and profound. It's that easy. Or difficult, if you think so. Create better habits. Raise your awareness and you'll raise your experience of life. When you can take delight in just watching a sunset, or shapes of clouds on a windy day, or the forms of foliage, or the play of light and shadows on trees - You are in full awareness of the moment. A state also called 'no-thought'. Sure, your mind will want some validation - Hey! Look at this! - But that's essentially what it was made to do anyway. To warn you about dangers. Predators. Potholes. Beyond these physical dangers, it doesn't serve much purpose. Observe your surroundings for what it really is. When we cease to negotiate, manipulate, cajole, obfuscate, associate, conquer, divide - what is left is peace. Also called joy, awe, wonder, love, fulfilment, oneness, stability, connection. I think that is the goal of it all. To truly express ourselves wholeheartedly. Passionately. I think that's the secret ingredient. What a year it's been huh? 3 murals in a year. That's how many public spaces I've been asked to paint and occupy over the past 300 days or so we've been rotating around the sun.
The first of these was in June of 2022. I was approached by an interior design and construction firm. They were asked to locate me by the client - a multi national corporation. The client had seen a mural I did at Pasar Seni MRT Entrance A. This led to discussions, pricing, sketches and finally landing the job at the client's office. It was a great experience for me and my team (which consisted of my student Calvin, Marisa and my assistant Aishu). We completed the mural in about 2 weeks. The second one took a bit longer. Details cannot be released at the moment of writing this. But I will update the blog when the official video and launch of the outlet happens. I can say this though; that everyday we were there, we had to go through police checkpoints, conveyor belt Xray contraptions and that we were surrounded by commercial airplanes. The third mural in this story is this. It is located at a law firm and the boss, Fahri, is a great chap and a very intelligent, purposefully driven person and lawyer. Done at a public walkway, it is open to the public to view. It's a very forward thinking piece, pushing boundaries of what's known and trying to give sensibility and accountability to things that are unknown. A generous act of beautifying the wall in front of the office, this project has led to many great (and sometimes funny) discussions and revelations and has accrued interest from passersby in the Mutiara Damansara community. I believe that art (no matter what category or genre) - serves to unite people, foster honest conversations and are pieces where people can connect; if only just for a brief few moments. Art has the ability to stop a person in his/her tracks, to draw and cajole a person out of themselves. Being able to draw or paint well of course, is a prerequisite for this. But upon deeper introspection and understanding of how the world works, in no small feat does wishful thinking make things happen. Sure, we'd all like to be hired all the time doing what we love, but in reality, there are more parts to this. First of all, I believe in people. In everything that we set out to do, whether in business, sales, advertising, the arts, music, finance - It's about people. Ultimately, you'll be working with people most of the time. So it's best to study and understand people skills : The art of presentation, public speaking, listening, conceptualising, being humble, approachable, being grounded and truly knowing yourself both in and out. In general, we all have the same biological makeup, and psychological nuances. We all have our flaws and good points. To know oneself, is to know others. Secondly, it pays to be patient, honest, deliberate, dedicated, researched and open to new ideas, techniques and methods of executing your craft. Read more. Study. Spend time alone. Put in the work. It doesn't pay to be close minded, selfish or egotistical. Or to approach things from a place of lack or scarcity. The latter does not bode well in the larger scheme of things. It's beneath us. In my formative years working for people I've heard this axiom many times - That one should protect one's ideas. Safeguard them like they are the families jewels or gold. I've always had the feeling that there's something a bit wrong about that. Why so protective? Sure, some people may steal it, but isn't plagiarism the best form of flattery? It is only in my later years (after studying myself and the world) I've come to realize that people who say things like that are coming from a place of scarcity and lack. Ideas are bulletproof. An idea doesn't come from you. It comes from the Creative Source or the Universe. Nobody can take it away from you, because in the first place - it wasn't yours to begin with. We are all conduits. Nobody can take an idea or subtract it from you, because and idea only wants to grow (in the real sense of the word) bigger. I believe that if we over protect and try to claim the idea for ourselves - We are inherently killing and destroying the idea and negating it's original Source. I believe that by sharing the idea forward without fear nor favour is to accept graciously that we are connected and blessed to have been tuned into the frequency of the universe. The goal of life is to expand, experience and express oneself truly. In withholding things; we are being anti-life. Having tested this theory in my own life, I can with full confidence, reasoning and belief express that operating from abundance and gratitude - to trust the process - is the way of life. It arises in the way children play, share toys and exude enthusiastic energy while playing. It is evident in the dance. It appears when we are in the zone, when we are in the flow state of things. Sometimes, we have just lost our way, over time, growing up. 'Every child is an artist. The problem is staying an artist when we grow up' - Pablo Picasso Imagine a world where everyone shared their knowledge, resources and supported each other. Where everyone is full, optimal, knowledgeable and supportive. We'd have long solved a lot of problems in the world, or at least have better understanding of ourselves and our communities. Thinking this way inadvertently begets the question : But where will the darkness reside? Well, that is a good question. Chaos will always find a way. It is the counter balance to the light. To structure. Maybe it will manifest in perceived threats of violence, in injustice, and where tension resides. That is the counterbalance. Always trust the light and find a way. |
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